Based on public school meal programs, items like burgers, fries, pizza, fried chicken or nuggets, and the like would be replaced with more healthful and organic food options. Airports would be offered government incentives to feature salad bars offering locally-sourced fruits and vegetables, healthy lean meats and dairy, and more while discouraging vendors who choose to offer manufactured food items, fried foods, or fat-laden choices that exceed the minimum standards to receive the government subsidy.

Columnist Carlisle Scagel, of Airport Food Service magazine is firmly opposed to Obama’s plan. “This is not going to go over well with travelers who expect to get familiar food, fast, and affordably. When waiting for long hours in an airport, people don’t want their choices limited or restricted. Fruits and vegetables are fine. Just don’t take away the foods people have come to love and expect.”

DFW Airport Chef, Willie Greens, has another take. He says, “I see what eating the same old thing all the time is doing to my patrons. I see the fatigue, and listlessness in their eyes and faces. I applaud the First Lady and I think it’s about time we did more to curb the intake of fatty, greasy, food choices”.

In the end, it’s the airport consumer who will decide whether or not the time has come for such radical measures. If you don’t think this can happen, take a look at the story of the the 4 year old little girl who had her lunch rejected by a lunch inspector, then substituted the student’s home lunch for a school lunch. How about the military? Yes, the food inspectors are coming to a military base near you, making sure our troops eat healthy. As for airports, burgers and pizza or salads and veggies? You decide. Is it a good idea to have the government determine your food choices or can we choose for ourselves. What do you think?

While I’m sure that we can all agree on the potential danger of frosted cupcakes, I have to admit I’m a bit more concerned about the potential threat of fruitcakes that may have been overlooked. Not only are they dangerous for the potential ingredients, they can be used to club flight attendants and bash in the door to the cockpit. I wonder if TSA has given that any consideration. I’m just saying…

Dear Mr. Baldwin,

We were so sorry to hear about your unfortunate altercation with the flight crew of America Airlines Flight 4 that you attempted to use on Tuesday, December 6th. We at AccuConference-Air would like to extend to you an invitation to give us a try. Unlike that other carrier, our flight attendants won’t remind anyone of Catholic School gym teachers and our “in-flight rules” won’t stop you from using your favorite electronic devices and playing games like Words With Friends.

We believe our service is ideal for travelers like yourself and hope that by extending you this invitation, we can improve your future travel experiences and the experiences of those who will be spared the pleasure of your company. When airlines try to impose their rules on the traveling public and passengers, like yourself, stand up for themselves, it can create delays and unwanted embarrassment for all concerned. AccuConference-Air can spare you all of that stress and bad publicity. To this date, AccuConference-Air has never asked a passenger to turn off a device or removed a passenger from a plane. You can be assured, what happened with that other carrier will never happen with us.

We look forward to hearing from you very soon and providing you an experience that will leave you tweeting with satisfaction.

Sincerely yours,

The Staff & Crew of AccuConference-Air

At about 6′ tall, when I travel, I can bet my knees will be rubbing against the back of the passenger seat in front of me. I know this is a problem for many people, especially the unusually tall or long legged. Finding the right comfort zone or angle can frequently be managed, but when the person in that seat decides to recline, the war is on. Quite literally, in fact, flights have been turned around in the air due to unruly passengers coming to blows over a reclined seat.

A device has gained popularity among frequent fliers. It’s called Knee Defender from Gadget Duck. The great idea behind the Knee Defender is that it gives you, the passenger, the ability to protect your knees against the onslaught of seat-backs. Simply place Knee Defender on the arms of your tray table against the back of the seat cushion and the seat will no longer be able to recline. The video I’ve linked to above will demonstrate how effective Knee Defender can be.

The airlines and those who like to recline disagree about the Knee Defender. Some airlines have policies against the harmless little device and “any device that could cause damage to existing equipment, or that may diminish the design, function or capability of any aircraft part or component.”

Passengers who recline are standing up for their “right to recline” siting their purchased ticket and the capability of the seat as the basis of their cause. Common courtesy would suggest that taking the time to slowly recline or maybe giving a nod to the passenger seated behind you to let him/her know that you are about to recline could help prevent some discomfort.

While we all should have learned our manners including how to play fair and get along back on the playground, onboard a passenger jet it seems those rules don’t apply. In a 3-way battle for leg space and comfort, the recliners, non-recliners, and airlines all have a say with no clear winners.

Low-cost carrier, Frontier Airlines, announced a new ad campaign to bring their popular spokesanimals from aircraft tails to television, radio, outdoor, online, and email advertising.

But never fear! Mommy’s here! Jack’s person, Karen Pascoe, who found out that Jack was lost only 30 minutes before her flight was to depart, set into action spreading the news. Jack now has his own Facebook page, “Jack The Cat is Lost in AA Baggage at JFK”, and now has more than 1, 000 fans. Many of his fans are angry and drove AA to respond:

“Our JFK employees are using a variety of methods to try to find Jack, including setting cans of cat food by his kennel,” American Airlines spokesman Ed Martelle told msnbc.com. “Additionally, we are working with the Mayor’s Alliance for New York City to assist in providing humane animal traps … We offer our sincere regrets for this incident and are doing everything possible to locate him.”

Traps? Humane? Are they for real? Apparently so. In AA’s defense, they are bringing Ms. Pascoe back to JFK to help inspire Jack to return to his person. As of the time of this post, “Jack the Cat” is still on the lamb.

1. What is your real name?

2. What is your real address?

3. Where is your real destination?

4. In 50 words or less, describe your ultimate fantasy vacation destination and travel experience. Please include your list of celebrities, historical figures, individuals of various renown, or past acquaintances who would participate. What would your activities be? Describe in a manner similar too a blog or travel diary. Please include phone numbers of persons named. They may be contacted to confirm any connection to terrorist activities.

5. Who dressed you today? Are they connected to terrorism?

6. Flip-flops or sandals? Business or casual? Please elaborate.

7. In the performance of a security search of your carry-on baggage, are we most likely to find A.) Medications, B.) Clean Underwear, or C.) Liquid/gel-based explosives?

8. Are you now or have you ever been a terrorist?

9. Have you ever considered becoming a terrorist?

10. Under what circumstances would you consider becoming a terrorist?

11. If given the choice between working in fast-food or becoming a terrorist, which would you choose?

12. Could your significant other drive you to become a terrorist?

13. In a fashion sense, what kind of accessories would you wear with an explosive vest?

14. Do you believe a terrorist can be involved in a truly committed relationship?

15. Has this interview changed your opinion of the TSA? Boston Logan International Airport? Air Transportation safety?

16. Would you recommend the TSA and Boston Logan International Airport to your friends?

17. How many 3oz bottles of explosives would fit into a quart-size clear zip-top bag?

18. In a battle between a terrorist and Chuck Norris, who would win?

19. In 50 words or less, would you please explain Charlie Sheen?

20. Can you think of any reason or any question I’ve failed to ask that would make it obvious to anyone here that you are unsafe or unfit for travel from Boston Logan International Airport?

Thank you for your cooperation. It has been our pleasure interviewing you today. We appreciate your cooperation in keeping air travel safe for everyone. Please keep Boston Logan International Airport and the TSA in mind whenever you have travel plans. We hope you will share your experience on Youtube or in your Facebook status and we look forward to seeing you again soon.

Software developers have devised a way for the full-body scan to display the most necessary information over the outline of a male or female form somewhat reminiscent of gingerbread people. This image omits the minute details of the person’s body displaying only the vital information the TSA agent needs to be able to see. Less body and more dignity lets travelers obey the rules without the psychological discomfort.

Wouldn’t you have expected something like this next story happening much sooner? Who would have guessed a 61 year old businesswoman named Yukari Mihamae in Phoenix, AZ would be the traveler who would have one body search too many? Seems she decided to take the law, er…breasts at least, into her own hands. The TSA agent apparently had some difficulty convincing Mihamae that she was required to allow the search by scanner. During her refusal to comply, Mihamae took hold of the TSA’s breasts then squeezed and twisted. Mihamae was arrested and charges were filed for felony sexual abuse. While sexual assault by anyone is wrong, plenty of travelers feel the methods for searching a passenger are equally offensive. Somebody was bound to fight back. Who’d have thought it would be grandma? Guess they had purple nurples in her day, too.

Finally, if you are fortunate (or unfortunate) enough to be a “frequent flyer”, then more good news may be coming your way, too. A plan is under development to allow passengers deemed frequent flyers to be expedited through the security checkpoints to help reduce lines and to make the process quicker for those seen on a regular basis. As of today, no one really knows how well it will work, but speculation is this will bring much needed relief for all travelers through shorter wait times.

When you add it up, this is pretty good news across the board. Less waiting in line, less violation of your body, and a fantasy-come-to-life where grandma takes quick advantage of a TSA agent who crossed too far into her personal space. Gotta love it.